i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
