I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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