is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
