Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
That was an excessively violent trivia night
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize