Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I will be naked everywhere
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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