my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
