You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Just high enough for therapy.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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