Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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