Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Randomize
