His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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