have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
