you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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