Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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