Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
