Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Randomize