Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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