I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize