Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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