All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
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