capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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