whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
