I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
