I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
