I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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