You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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