What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Randomize
