My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
