Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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