stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
