Swine flu. Run for my life!
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
