It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Less talking, more tequila
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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