She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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