Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Randomize