In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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