I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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