Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Randomize
