when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize