Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
