Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
