STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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