This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I am available for nakedness
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
