she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
The dick lei will go down in squad history
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
