question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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