she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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