So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
