It's Friday. Sex?
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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