Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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