he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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