His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize