He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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