She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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