so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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