I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
now i know why i became what i already was.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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