I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
